Little Miss Mixed Emotions

If I were a Little Miss character (of the popular 'Little Miss/Little Mister' series of kid's books today I would be "Little Miss Mixed Emotions". My best friend here has packed up and moved to Atlanta. While I am, of course, proud of her for finishing up her degree after some years away from school and landing a new job, a small selfish part of me is stamping her foot and saying "What about ME?" Unfortunately as far as friends go there's not a lot of local bench strength. I don't know that I ever made friends easily but it certainly hasn't gotten come easy as an adult. I am friendly with many people but real friends, well, not so much. I'm kind of like the kid who begs and pleads for a sleepover but then when it finally comes to pass cries and has to be picked up at 8:30. An example-at a party last weekend I met a woman who, on paper, would have seemed to be a perfect match-we were so alike in a 'seperated at birth' kind of way (both went to all girls high school named Mercy, both worked for Borders, both had no thyroid) but when the time came to seal the deal with a 'let's do something' I couldn't.

This leaving has racheted up all other emotions too. From the series finale of "The Gilmore Girls" which made me cry so hard I couldn't speak to the embarrassment from a weekend smackdown I'm feeling everything just a little too much. My emotional idle is revving too high and, for now, I can't find the switch.

So, as a giant carrot to brandish at these mixed emotions I took the remainder of my birthday and tax money and upgraded my car from a cassette to a CD player. It will be the first car I have ever owned that will have it's own CD player.

Let me repeat that.

It will be the first car I have ever owned that will have it's own CD player.

It's crazy, I know, I might as well be upgrading from an 8 Track and braking the Fred Flintstone way. And of course it doesn't fix the windshield crack or the dent in the trunk (I had a horrible thought as I was handing over my credit card that some repair will need to happen that will cost the exact amount the CD player did) but I took the plunge anyway.

My installation appointment isn't until Wednesday so I have some time to contemplate what the first CD will be. An old favorite? Something brand new? Something car related? It's a delicious question to consider.